This Is Ridiculous

I don't think I made a secret of my protracted quest to procure local artiste Joi Chua's compilation album 《淳佳精选17首》. I would, however, downplay any association made between my recent appreciation of the said singer's works and one Mr. Tan Wee Boon's selection of a song of hers as the focus of one of his many memorable Chinese lessons, and deny categorically that this recent craze was ignited by the heightening sense of nostalgia transpiring from my idle reminiscences about HL3, much as the latter might inherently be true. Perhaps unpardonably, my seminal encounter with a Joi Chua song was indeed Ah Boon's tutorial (Having lived in Singapore for in excess of a decade, I somehow managed to escape her songs). If you bear this in mind, the (admittedly not overly obscure) irony of yesterday's turn of events will be to you very apparent.

I paced up and down the lanes in one of the Sembawang Music outlets that figured on my itinerary, peering intently at the CDs racked along the shelves and searching for my quarry, with my customary obstinacy precluding the presumably wiser move of asking an attendant for assistance. When, as it usually does, good sense prevailed, I was asked "So you looking for what title?" in reply, to which I answered, "《淳佳精选17首》，蔡淳佳", with my elocution suffering for the change of language in neither crispness nor accuracy, I hasten to add. The next line caught me by surprise.

"Har you talk Chinese one ah? 哦我还以为你不是华人leh!"

"Eh, 我是哪里不像华人？"

"不知道lor，就是一点怪怪leh."

Was it my favourite grey suedes, admittedly an uncommon possession among your typical rank-and-file Chinese man, that were giving me the air of refinery perceived to be exclusive to the classier "ang moh pais"? 就算是的话，所谓的“ang moh pai”难道一接受这新的身分后就不再是华人了吗？更重要的问题是：“我们华人什么时候开始那么自卑，什么时候开始瞧不起自己的言语， 把它看待成一个‘低级’人士的沟通方式呢？说实话，我本人究竟几次耻笑受中文教育人士讲英文结结巴巴呢，我心里有数。但即将出国念书的我突然被“震”醒了。可能是快要和别人的生活方式与习俗碰面的关系吧，使我比较强烈地珍惜那属于自己的文化。

昨天的现象不是第一次发生，但关键是这一回的对方也是黄皮肤的。好几次我回马国时给马来德士司机问我类似的问题。说我样貌像泰国人，像葡国人，像“混血人”的都有。但他们又不是华人，整天驾德士口又闲，叫我怎么去介意呢？对，我是“ang moh pai"，我这一辈子无论开口说话或下笔写字，中文就是和英文打败仗，但我依然坚持说一个人运用的言语和他所谓的“class”（若上伟汶老师课的话，早就有人把它翻译为“班级”乐哦:D) 毫无关系。而且，我也估计自己在外国时会无特别地怀念那些八频道的连续据（我不是依靠字幕的！）

还有哦，这个“ang moh pai” 考中文B HL 考到7分呢！你告诉我，去年全新加坡有几位学生领到那样优秀的成绩呢？:P